“I waited patiently for the Lord;
He turned to me and heard my cry.
He lifted me out of the mud and mire;
He set my feet on a rock
And gave me a firm place to stand.
He put a new song in my mouth,
A hymn of praise to our God.
Many will see and fear the Lord
And put their trust in Him.”
Psalm 40:1-3
I grew up in a Christian home, involved in church, and attended church school. However, the doctrine of that church was based on legalism and the pure truth of salvation by grace was not in it. I was not taught about the Holy Spirit or about confession of sins. I had head knowledge of God, but not heart knowledge.
In 2015, I thought I had it all together. I was a wife, mother of three, enrolled in a Clinical Counseling MA program at Regent University. I attended church regularly, and all three kids were in church school. Then, things took a turn that would change my life forever. I went through a traumatic divorce. My life fell apart. I began to question everything.
I spent the next seven years looking for a new identity and fulfillment in all the wrong places. I began a descent into sin that went deeper and deeper…including drugs, alcohol, and men. During this time, I also began seeking the true gospel and delved into other religions such as Buddhism.
In January 2021, I opened a Christmas gift from a friend. It was a Bible. I hadn’t opened a Bible in years since becoming discouraged with Christianity due to the hypocrisy in the church of my youth and in my own family. As I opened the box, there it lay in pristine condition: a leather-bound Bible – with my name engraved in gold on the front! I had a breakthrough and started crying. It was the first time in a long time I had allowed myself to feel anything. I felt God’s love surrounding me and filling the empty, gaping vortex inside my soul.
I realized that I was God who had saved me multiple times from death during the last six years. He had a plan for my life! I was filled with renewed energy. I got rid of my pictures of Buddha and started reading my Bible. But I was still struggling with drugs and alcohol. I resolved to get sober, but I couldn’t do it on my own.
Finally, after seven years of what I call “wandering in the wilderness” – I hit rock bottom in April 2022. I had come to a crossroad. A Scripture came to mind from Deuteronomy 30:19, 20: “Today I have given you the choice between life and death, between blessings and curses. Now I call on heaven and earth to witness the choice you make. Oh, that you would choose life, so that you and your descendants might live!”
I chose life. I was in a dangerous situation with an abusive ex-boyfriend who had a gun. One day, I escaped to a neighbor’s house and asked her to help me. She took me to Shepherd’s Gate, a women’s shelter in Greenville, SC. On the way there, I asked her to stop at a gas station where I threw away my drugs and cigarettes.
After arriving at Shepherd’s Gate on April 26, 2022, having repented of my sins, I accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior and surrendered to His will. Three weeks later, I went to Miracle Hill Renewal on May 19, 2022.
At Renewal, I realized that in all my 49 years, I never knew what love really is. My faith in God has been nurtured and strengthened by seeing the love of Christ actively demonstrated in the lives of Miracle Hill staff, Ministry Trainees, Volunteers, and Donors. For someone like me, who was raised in the cold, empty, futility of legalism, it is utterly life-changing to know Christians who really love Jesus and whose words and actions are driven by the power of the Holy Spirit. As it is written in 1 John 4:7, 8: “Anyone who loves is a child of God and knows God. But anyone who does not love does not know God, for God is love.”
Thanks to the power of Jesus Christ and the teachings from God’s Word I received from Miracle Hill Renewal: I am now able to receive love and love others in agape love. I know who I am and have an identity in Christ. I learned how to pray. I learned how to confess my sin daily to stay in fellowship with God. I was able to forgive my ex-husband and pray daily for those who rejected me. I have peace that passes understanding.
I plan to be a living amends to my family, and I know that one day, in His perfect timing, God will open the door to reconciliation.
Additionally, the Lord is restoring me in amazing ways: I now have many spiritual mothers. I am part of the Body of Christ, adopted into the family of God. In the words of Isaiah: “For the spiritual children of the desolate one will be more than the children of the married wife, says the Lord…For your Maker is your Husband – the Lord of hosts is His name – and the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer: the God of the whole earth He is called…And all your spiritual children shall be disciples and great shall be the peace and undisturbed composure of your children.” Isaiah 54:1, 5, 13 AMP Bible.
I now have a fervent desire to spend the rest of my life serving the Lord Jesus in eager anticipation of His second coming! Since graduating from the Renewal program, I served as a Ministry Trainee at Shepherd’s Gate. It was a great honor to serve there and to be able to share my testimony as to what God has done for me.
After my internship at Shepherd’s Gate, I worked at Miracle Hill Thrift Store on Pleasantburg Drive as a Merchandising Supervisor. Currently, I work as a Kaizen Technician promoting Six Sigma initiatives at a manufacturing facility. I am particularly interested in evangelism, and I love to share my testimony of what God has done to turn my life around. I look forward to all that God has planned for my life as I dedicate each day to following Jesus Christ!